The Foundation of a Purpose-Centered Alliance
The concrete foundation of a house is the first step in construction. It determines the strength and the shape of the finished product. In financial planning, the foundation of the working relationship is trust. The information the client brings and the skills you provide will form a strong bond if they are grounded in mutual trust.
In preparation for this meeting, you should have asked the client (and spouse, if married) to bring financial information and a copy of his or her last tax return.
—The Goals of This Meeting
The four goals for the initial meeting are:
- To establish an emotional connection and begin to build significant trust;
- To get essential personal as well as specific financial information about the prospective client;
- To give information about yourself and your ability to help them succeed (by modeling care and demonstrating trustworthiness); and
- To get a commitment to move forward in building a purpose-centered alliance.
—The Conversation about Purpose
After very brief introductions, immediately get to the point by saying: “In order to serve you most effectively, I need to know some important things about you. I’m going to ask you a few questions so I can learn what matters most to you and how your financial goals relate to what matters most. ”Then ask three questions:
(You may want to explain: “For some people, family matters most at this stage of life. For some, a comfortable retirement matters most. Others want the biggest house and the finest car they can buy.”)
- Please tell me: What matters most to you?
If a couple is meeting with you, ask both of them to respond to each question. Don’t interrupt as the person answers. Take notes and write down exact phrases, repeating them throughout the conversation to ensure absolute clarity. Once you’re sure you’ve heard clearly, restate what matters most to them to be sure you’re both in agreement.
- How do finances relate to (whatever the person said matters most)?
Again, be quiet as both people answer. Take good notes and restate their responses for clarity.
- What is your experience, good and bad, with money and investments?
The response to this question will tell you how sophisticated your clients are as money managers. Be very careful to avoid making suggestions or offering free advice—even though it will be a natural temptation at this point. If someone starts asking questions, explain that you will get to their questions but this is not the right time. You still need more time for discovery.
Repeat back to clients what they’ve told you about what matters most, the role of money in fulfilling their dreams, and their need for assistance in these areas.
During this conversation, watch for clues about the personality profiles of each person. Statements about what matters most, the clarity of answers, and the focus on goals or relationships will tell you volumes about the person’s emotional and behavioral make up. In addition, look for nonverbal signals such as heightened interest, fidgeting, or impatience to tell you whether you are tailoring your approach correctly. Remember that opposites attract, and quite often a husband will have one profile and his wife’s will be very different. In those situations you need to use your skills of diplomacy to make sure your approach keeps both of them interested and captures both of their hearts.
Consider Asking a Follow-Up Question
When I attended the Residency Program, my mentor Rich asked us a provocative question: “What is your first memory of money?” I immediately thought of my work for the Detroit Free Press. When I was a boy, I delivered newspapers so I could afford to buy nicer tennis shoes. My Mom bought me cheap, vinyl shoes, and I hated to wear them. She and I worked out a deal: She gave me the amount of money that the vinyl shoes cost, and I chipped in my earnings from my paper route so I could get nicer, leather shoes. Money meant a lot to me at that time in my life. It was a way to upgrade my shoes from vinyl to leather so I didn’t look like a first-class geek.
You may want to use this same question to help uncover what matters most to your clients. Discussing a person’s first memory of money is another way to connect on a profound, personal level. Some people will report positive and encouraging experiences, and some will recount painful memories, but each one is very meaningful. All of us have a first memory of money, and that memory has shaped our values and our lives in ways we often can’t imagine.
When we show interest in pivotal moments in clients’ lives—and especially the moments that relate to their view of money—they see that we care and they learn they can trust us. An oil company executive told me he remembers saving every penny he earned as a child. I asked the obvious follow-up question, “What were you saving for?” His eyes lit up and he told me how, when he was twelve years old, he had saved enough to buy something he had always dreamed of owning, a ham radio. This executive had been a very quiet and reserved person, but this simple question tapped into a memorable time in his life. In animated terms, he told me about talking to ham operators all over the world. This wonderful boyhood experience had happened because he saw money as a means to achieving his young dream. Later in the conversation I learned he is currently worth millions of dollars. When he chose to work with me on a financial strategy, he said, “Jim, I could use any of a dozen advisors I know, but I trust you.”
Asking about a person’s first memory of money is not magic, but it is a very useful tool to help us “read” them accurately and find out what has shaped their values. You are likely to discover that those who were given a lot of money when they were children have far different values than those who worked hard to earn it and then spent it on something they saw as supremely valuable.
Some people view money as simply a means of having things they want, but others see money as a way to help other people. In the hearts of some clients, money gives them power to dominate others. It is a measuring stick of their success. But I’ve talked to men and women who care very little about power or prestige. To them, money provides a way to stay connected to the people they love most. As we understand their perspectives about money, we get a glimpse of their hearts, and we can begin to tailor a personal financial strategy to fulfill their dreams.
Want to Learn More?
What Matters Most: Coach-Training for Insurance and Financial Advisors.
A Helpful Resource for You and Your
Clients…
Make Your Money Count
Connecting your resources to what matters most
“Make Your Money Count stands out from other guides on money management because it drives home an important truth: Clarifying your purpose in life is the essential element in financial planning. The book offers an excellent blueprint for success and provides easy-to-follow steps that will align your money with your best intentions and put your finances in divine order.”
— Ken Blanchard, co-author of The One Minute
Manager® and Leading at a Higher Level
“As trusted advisors, we recognize that motivation is the key to change. In Make Your Money Count, Jim Munchbach provides powerful motivations to connect our finances with our purpose in life. This, I know, makes all the difference in the world. I enthusiastically recommend Jim’s book”
— Ron Blue, Kingdom Advisors